M-W.com<\/a> defines grief as<\/p>\n“deep and poignant distress caused by or as if by bereavement.”\u00a0<\/span><\/p>\nThat makes it sounds like the pain somehow stays inside, though. Like it’s cutting deep, but that cut is within you.<\/p>\n
Real grief runs even deeper–it’s like a bullet hole that goes in almost clean on one side, but on its way out, it destroys everything and leaves a gaping hole on the back. It’s a pain that cuts\u00a0through<\/em> you.<\/p>\nIt’s been six months since D. died.\u00a0 Six months today.\u00a0 I feel like a survivor of that bullet blast and the surface wound has started to heal and some scar tissues is forming, but I’ll do one thing wrong…like pick up a picture of my baby brother and it’s all new, all over again.<\/p>\n
The good news is that I can go days without crying.<\/p>\n
The good news is that people are moving past that stage where they walk on eggshells and ask in that nervous tone…How are you doing<\/em>?\u00a0 Because that, while people mean well, puts me right back there to that day.<\/p>\nChristmas is going to be hard. My husband and I, my kids…together as a whole, I think we came through this stronger for it–I feel like I’ve forged in the fires of hell now.\u00a0 But my family as a whole hasn’t done very well and that is going to make the holidays even harder.<\/p>\n
I’m trying to get back on schedule with regular stuff, though.\u00a0 As much as I can.<\/p>\n
One thing is for certain…death happens.\u00a0 And the world keeps on turning.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
Sometimes words don’t cover it. Grief. Grieving. They don’t really touch what you feel when you lose somebody who is a part of you. 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![\"Grief](\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.shilohwalker.com\/website\/wp-content\/uploads\/2017\/11\/bigstock-Close-Up-Of-Old-English-Dictio-155338595.jpg?resize=468%2C312\")
Grief. Grieving. They don’t really touch what you feel when you lose somebody who is a part of you.<\/p>\n