{"id":32386,"date":"2013-07-20T09:00:30","date_gmt":"2013-07-20T13:00:30","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/www.shilohwalker.com\/website\/?p=32386"},"modified":"2013-07-12T09:39:41","modified_gmt":"2013-07-12T13:39:41","slug":"saturday-snippets-the-unwanted","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.shilohwalker.com\/website\/2013\/07\/saturday-snippets-the-unwanted\/","title":{"rendered":"Saturday Snippets… The Unwanted"},"content":{"rendered":"

The boys of summer…<\/p>\n

\"Unwanted-The72sm\"<\/a>
\nNo nightmares.<\/p>\n

There were dreams, but she couldn\u2019t call them nightmares.<\/p>\n

Hot, sexy dreams where Caleb put his hands on her and she returned the favor. They were the kind of dreams that had her kicking off the blankets and when she woke up sometime near two a.m., hovering on the edge of orgasm, it took a great deal of willpower to keep from climbing out of her bed and finding him in his.<\/p>\n

It took almost as much willpower not to push her hand between her thighs and bring herself to the climax she could feel hovering just out of reach.<\/p>\n

She ached with the need for it.<\/p>\n

For a long, long time, she\u2019d existed without any of that. It wasn\u2019t even that hard. After what had happened with Dawn, she\u2019d turned herself into a tool. Focused on the job, on making herself better so that she never made such awful mistakes again. She\u2019d always acted on impulse, lived by the emotions that guided her gift, actions that led to the awful mistakes she\u2019d made.<\/p>\n

In response, she\u2019d cut off those emotions. She couldn\u2019t stop\u00a0feeling<\/i>\u00a0but she could damn well stop letting them control her and it became second nature. Sexual desires, pleasure, even simple happiness had all become obstacles that were in the way of the job, so she shut them off.<\/p>\n

Odd and random dreams about Caleb would slip in, but they were forgotten almost as soon as she woke up, and when she didn\u2019t forget them soon enough, she reminded herself about what he\u2019d done. How he\u2019d hurt her. How he\u2019d left her. That made it even easier.<\/p>\n

But it was almost impossible to brush this dream away, this need away, when he was sleeping just a few yards away.<\/p>\n

She missed his heat.<\/p>\n

She missed his quiet strength and the way she felt so much steadier when she was near him.<\/p>\n

She just plain missed him.<\/p>\n

And you didn\u2019t say a thing to stop me. Every step of the way, I waited for you to say something, Destin. Every damn step.<\/i><\/p>\n

His words echoed in her mind and she had to wonder, how much different would her life have been if she\u2019d given in to that impulse? She\u2019d always thought that he\u2019d changed his mind.<\/p>\n

He\u2019d told her that he loved her, and she\u2019d almost believed him. Almost. But Destin had had people tell her they loved her before. Like her mom and dad. And then her abilities had started to surface and their\u00a0love<\/i>\u00a0hadn\u2019t been all that real, after all. They\u2019d hated her. Feared her.<\/p>\n

Had even thought maybe she was as bad as some of the monsters out there.\u00a0Monstrous little thing\u2014<\/i><\/p>\n

It wasn\u2019t so far a stretch for her to think that the man she\u2019d thought she might have loved had changed his mind about them. If she had reached out to him,\u00a0then<\/i>, would things be different\u00a0now<\/i>?<\/p>\n

\u201cIt\u2019s too late to worry about that,\u201d she whispered. \u201cNo do-overs allowed.\u201d<\/p>\n

He didn\u2019t seem all that different. A few more lines around the lines and maybe a little more serious, but all in all, Caleb was just as he\u2019d always been. Solid, strong, steady.<\/p>\n

She was different, though. She was completely different and if she needed any reminder of that, it was in the mirror. Stroking a finger down the scar, she closed her eyes and curled up on the bed and waited for the miserable, achy need to subside. It took too long. By the time she was able to fall back to sleep, hours had passed.<\/p>\n

Come dawn, she woke to hear him moving out in the sitting area; she didn\u2019t bother trying to go back to sleep. She opened the door and almost swallowed her tongue when she saw him. He was wearing nothing but a pair of running shorts and another old T-shirt with the sleeves torn off, leaving his biceps bare.<\/p>\n

A fine sheen of sweat highlighted his muscles and she watched, mesmerized as he lowered himself to the floor and then pushed himself back up. Slow, steady.<\/p>\n

Talk about a perfect push-up. The man could have done a TV infomercial, the way he looked.<\/p>\n

Of course, he\u2019d always looked good.<\/p>\n

Get over it, Des<\/i>,\u00a0<\/i>she told herself. Squaring her shoulders, she made herself walk past him into the small kitchenette. She desperately needed coffee. Coffee, and a psych eval. She went about making the coffee and tried to pretend she wasn\u2019t watching him as he did a good fifty more push-ups beyond however many he\u2019d already done and then shifted around to lie on the ground and do crunches.<\/p>\n

The hotel had a perfectly good gym. Why couldn\u2019t he do his workout\u00a0there<\/i>\u00a0instead of in here?<\/p>\n

Five more minutes passed while she stayed in the kitchenette and drank her coffee. She passed the time by studying an absurdly boring abstract painting and hoped by the time she had her coffee done, he\u2019d have his workout done.<\/p>\n

But she planned it a little too perfectly. He finished up his workout at exactly the same time as she finished her coffee, which meant they ended up running into each other at the refrigerator.<\/p>\n

\u201cI didn\u2019t wake you up, did I?\u201d<\/p>\n

Destin shrugged. She almost told him the truth, but she figured that would have just given him more of an excuse to keep talking and she wanted to go hide in her room while she got her treacherous body under control.<\/p>\n

He didn\u2019t seem fooled. \u201cI take that means yes,\u201d he said, shifting so that she couldn\u2019t go around him unless she brushed up against his body.<\/p>\n

A body that was damp with sweat and way too hard on her self-control. \u201cI was already awake.\u201d<\/p>\n

Caleb studied her face. \u201cYou don\u2019t look like you slept well. Nightmares?\u201d<\/p>\n

Shit, no<\/i>. But she wasn\u2019t about to tell him that she hadn\u2019t slept well because she kept having lurid sexual fantasies with him as the one and only star. \u201cSome dreams did keep waking me up, but it\u2019s nothing I can\u2019t handle,\u201d she hedged.<\/p>\n

A sympathetic look entered his eyes and he reached out, skimmed his fingers down her arm. \u201cNeed to talk about them?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cNo.\u201d Talking used to help. Or rather, talking with\u00a0him<\/i>\u00a0had helped. But no way, no how was that happening now, even if it had been nightmares keeping her awake. Nope.<\/p>\n

He squeezed. \u201cYou sure?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cIf I wanted to talk about them, I\u2019d talk about them,\u201d she snapped. Lack of sleep, need and general moodiness were quickly eroding any politeness she might have started out with when she climbed out of bed. She jerked her shoulder away and shoved past him. \u201cWe\u2019re not together any more, remember?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cJust because we\u2019re not together doesn\u2019t mean I can\u2019t listen.\u201d<\/p>\n

Destin stopped in her tracks and turned back to him. \u201cYes. It does. I laid my soul bare for you because I felt safe doing so.\u00a0Then<\/i>. But that\u2019s changed now.\u201d<\/p>\n

Caleb narrowed his eyes. \u201cSo that means you don\u2019t feel safe doing it now?\u201d<\/p>\n

\u201cThat\u2019s exactly what it means,\u201d she said. Destin rubbed her hands over her face and then drove her fingers through her hair. The words danced on the back of her tongue, fighting to be free, and for once, she decided,\u00a0to hell with pride.<\/i><\/p>\n

Amazon<\/a>\u00a0|\u00a0BN<\/a>\u00a0\u00a0| \u00a0iBooks<\/a>\u00a0|\u00a0Kobo<\/a>\u00a0|\u00a0Samhain<\/a><\/p>\n

Lauren Dane<\/a>
\n Shelli Stevens<\/a>
\nLeah Braemel<\/a>
\nJody Wallace<\/a>
\nCaris Roane<\/a>
\nEliza Gayle<\/a>
\nLissa Matthews<\/a>
\nMandy M. Roth<\/a>
\nMcKenna Jeffries<\/a>
\nTaige Crenshaw<\/a>
\nDelilah Devlin<\/a>
\nHelenKay Dimon<\/a>
\nTJ Michaels<\/a>
\nMyla Jackson<\/a>
\nFelicity Heaton<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"

The boys of summer… No nightmares. There were dreams, but she couldn\u2019t call them nightmares. 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